STEP 1

We are off to another adventure!!! Yay! So I quit my job.. wait i am quitting my job,they just don't know it right nowww....but will in the morning,(atleast the legally accepted 'am awake' time in the morning). It is scary,it sure is, to think that pay check wont be there every end month read job security,it sure is scary BUT am also excited:-)! I have and am learning alot on me,how things weave together and burn apart and one of the lessons drilled so far being "Fear is normal with new things/ventures/decisions/everything, so use it to drive and motivate you :)" easier said than done huh? Well, it all takes steps, a step and another and so on and so forth. So first step, accepting the fear is there. Two changing your mindset on what fear/the fear is. Three doing something about overcoming the fear/ using it to work with you(well that sounds better in my head, some things just cannot be expressed beyond your feel :) )

Here I am with my big step and so help me God with each step. Its going to be a beautiful year and life.
:-)

Photo credit: rawforbeauty.com

random rant 1

she just happens to be here,
he just happened to be gone,
just twirling with time,she just happened to smile,
smile the roots decay,
smile her warmth away,
tease her breath to sane,
loose a tear to waste,

she just happened to stand,
he just happened to lay,
lay with her she be,
she with his memories reincarnated,
death to all that hurts,
unlife her chains,
her bits of naked pride,
happen her way again,
life in her her breath again.

she,
he,
they,
then him,
sway your head to your find,
not the let or the right,
swing by your nerves,
break,
fall in love with yourself again.

FAR FROM RAY

Trying to make the best out of the ashes on her palms,
what has she done? no wait . .
 what did she do this time . .
 her blood stained yellow dress barely covering her 'never say die' locked up innocence,
 "they wont find you here,
not this time,
 when i can smell the hurt,
choke on the pieces they left you in,
see your then blood on their lips,
second to tears on your pillow,
my chest,
your every almost happy,"
so he said . .
so
he
said. .
 what did she do this time?..
 Their tale too cliche to repeat,
Her tale,
a circle of dents with the same hits and bruises,
same cracks,
hope,
lost.
faith,
burnt,
same timings.
just like clock work,
you watch her drown, .
what did you do this time?
her knees grazed gently on the gravel, just as if they were trying to leave her,
leave her for a pound of flesh,
raged,
empty,
straining with her lungs again,.
what did she do this time. .
 kill herself?
didnt we try getting through that already???
mmmmppphh.... she could not stomach a world of no world, .
a then of never,
a less pained her,
 . .yeah she said it, a less ached her,
 a complete she,..
what did she do this time??
 her nails chipped off like a plan,
ah ah, . that doesn't sound right,
lets try this again,
her nails chipped off with life,
eyes blankly staring at him,
floor,
walls,
cold. .
what did she do this time???
breathe,

Add caption

she just breathed.

Instances

Those instances,


those bleeps in time when all stands still yet you cant keep up,
those mildly pleasing aches you seek just to get a nerve smiling,
those unconventional passes made that you blow over just to drown better,


those instances with they,
those blind cuts with more rational finds,
those undeclared emotions vented to vacuums of screw you,
those trances of motions silenced by reality,
found,
lost,
am,
those things you cross by uncoded,
those people faded with a blink,
those nights enveloped with a fix,


those instances with she,
those stares with mindless raptures of hate,
those eyes drugged on a conscience dosed on acid,
those laughs chuckled to drip far fetched gods of safe,
worn,
won,
a ribbon to it,
those tight cheeked moments ended with a dose of pills,


those instances male,
those tragic windows with him,
those oh so tragic breaks laced with his prints,
those sorry paced days,
those sweet,.
those sweet locks of heart cursed feels,
those blessed pessimistic senses tearing up to right wrong,
those wrong saws chiselled to mend you,


those instances.  

google

Wake?¿

Lesson to be nailed in:

life is too short to be too analytical..

 If you are anything like me,breaking down things,all ways, is a 'speciality',.wait more like a hunch back,wait,that sounds discrimitive,lets go back to speciality.

google

                                                                     


Its about time i flushed the stats down the toilet,.embrace my random side thats always bursting out,only for the stats-popo(go with it)  to get em poor rays back in.. tough rays they are,cause they always plotting even when getting their 'think you can escape us?' beatdowns. Yay them!might just be my ticket to "i no care about the 'havebeens' ".

from google

 Blow a candle girl!you might get your o. .uh uh uh!she went and just said it huh?tsk. :)